Your family is hurting as much or even more than you are!
A good friend made me aware of this early into my recovery. I worked hard to keep this at the forefront of my mind. My wife put on a strong face as she dealt with all of the possible outcomes of my accident; from death to never walking again. On top of that, she was having to carry a huge load...caring for an 18 month old, working 50 hours per week, staying with me each night and keeping a household running. She was and still is a trooper! Despite her "poker face", inside she was hurting in a big way. She almost lost me. She could have easily found me dead on the floor! I am sure that thought crossed her mind many times and the reality of it (after the shock wore off) had to be emotionally crushing.
I have said this 1000 times and will continue to say it....our family and our closest and dearest of friends stepped up and took care of Robbie, Collier and me. I will never forget all they have sacrificed to care for us. I will never forget what Robbie sacrificed for me! "...in sickness and in health..." Your wedding vows really do mean something!
The obvious lesson here is that despite what I am going through, I still must think of others and not spend all of my time thinking or focusing on ME!
Again, thank you to my wife who has given and continues to give all that she has to help me and the healing process. Thank you Collier for bringing me a book to sit in my lap and read. Thank you to my Mom and Granny for coming each month to help us take care of our house and Collier. Thank you to my Dad for all of his prayer and encouraging words. Thank you to my 2nd Mom (Robbie's Mom) for spending extra time in caring for Collier and for us and for spending nights with me at the hospital. Thank you to my 2nd Dad (Robbie's Dad) for building ramps, watching Collier and even spending the night with me in the hospital, changing light bulbs and all of the other little things you did. Thanks to my true friends who emailed, called, visited, cleaned up the mess I made in the dinning room, brought food and goodies, who watched me closely for depression and the list goes on and on..... Thanks to my Church staff who visited me in the hospital...especially Dave Hughey who came several times and spend hours with me just talking....those talks gave me peace and hope.
So many people praying and thinking of us.....God knows who you are!
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Lesson #13
Lets continue with my lessons learned.....
When in a wheel chair, you are fully aware when the ground/floor is not level!
Ok, this may sound very simple, yet until you are in a wheel chair, you really do not appreciate level ground.
My first real experience with this was the first time my wife, son and me took a walk/ride around the block to get some fresh air. Half way around the block, I notice that my right arm was doing all of the work to keep my chair in motion. My right arm was killing me! I was thinking, "what is the deal here!" Even though the sidewalk seemed level, it wasn't. When the ground is not level, one arm is going to do all of the work to keep you moving in a straight line. Needless to say, we too few trips around the block in the wheel chair!
When in a wheel chair, you are fully aware when the ground/floor is not level!
Ok, this may sound very simple, yet until you are in a wheel chair, you really do not appreciate level ground.
My first real experience with this was the first time my wife, son and me took a walk/ride around the block to get some fresh air. Half way around the block, I notice that my right arm was doing all of the work to keep my chair in motion. My right arm was killing me! I was thinking, "what is the deal here!" Even though the sidewalk seemed level, it wasn't. When the ground is not level, one arm is going to do all of the work to keep you moving in a straight line. Needless to say, we too few trips around the block in the wheel chair!
Last Post of 2008
4 months & 22 Days
Wow! Tomorrow is the beginning of 2009! Amazing!
My Wheel Chair is Gone!
I turned my wheel chair in over 3 weeks ago. I was no longer using it and the fact that I was leasing it, I believed it was time to send it back. It was pretty cool to see the guys load it into their van and then drive off. I waved goodbye! See ya!
Healing is Progressing!
I completed my first 6 weeks of physical therapy right before the week of Christmas. On my last day, I noticed that I was doing my exercises without pain. Up to this time, I called the pool I worked out in the "torture chamber." But here I was, walking, kicking and stretching without noticeable pain!! How awesome God is!
Next week, I will begin another 6 weeks of PT. I will spend 2 days a week on land-based therapy and only 1 day per week in the pool. My therapist wants to work on the side-ways motion (eversion and inversion) of my ankles.
I was chided a little at my last doc appt to spend more time off my feet and with them elevated. So I have committed to a minimum of 2 hours per day with my feet elevated.
Please continue to pray for God to completely restore my feet!
Wow! Tomorrow is the beginning of 2009! Amazing!
My Wheel Chair is Gone!
I turned my wheel chair in over 3 weeks ago. I was no longer using it and the fact that I was leasing it, I believed it was time to send it back. It was pretty cool to see the guys load it into their van and then drive off. I waved goodbye! See ya!
Healing is Progressing!
I completed my first 6 weeks of physical therapy right before the week of Christmas. On my last day, I noticed that I was doing my exercises without pain. Up to this time, I called the pool I worked out in the "torture chamber." But here I was, walking, kicking and stretching without noticeable pain!! How awesome God is!
Next week, I will begin another 6 weeks of PT. I will spend 2 days a week on land-based therapy and only 1 day per week in the pool. My therapist wants to work on the side-ways motion (eversion and inversion) of my ankles.
I was chided a little at my last doc appt to spend more time off my feet and with them elevated. So I have committed to a minimum of 2 hours per day with my feet elevated.
Please continue to pray for God to completely restore my feet!
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Lesson #12
Despite the fact that a building has handicap parking, it may not be ADA compliant; not having wheel chair accessibility!
I left the hospital in a wheel chair. For several weeks, I could not put any weight on either foot. That meant that everywhere I went outside of my home, had to be wheel chair accessible.
Case in point: I was out with my family one day and we went to a local place of business to pick up some merchandise we had ordered. We drove up to the front of the building and parked in the handicap parking because we had a permit to do so. Robbie got out and proceeded to get my wheel chair out. I told her to stop! She asked why. I said, look at the front door. She looked and muttered, "You are kidding?" The door had steps leading up to it with no ramp.
So despite the fact that the American Disability Act has been in place for many years, there are many businesses that are not in compliance! People with disabilities deal with this every day of their lives!
Lesson #11
Obedience to God; studying His word; prayer and putting others before myself are more important than my priorities and overbooked calendar!
I know the statement I just typed is more than a mouth full and may not make sense, so let me briefly explain:
I believe with all of my heart that the #1 tool Satan uses to keep us from experiencing all that God has for us is being TOO BUSY! For years I have heard this proverb, "An idle mind is the Devil's workshop." I am here to tell you that THE OPPOSITE is true and here is my new proverb: "An overbook calendar and ungodly priorities are the Devil's workshop!"
I am guilty of having ungodly priorities. I am guilty of having an overbooked calendar. And now that God has brought this storm into my life, I have realized that my priorities and my calendar are God's and He is the one that should be directing my path!
I see it everyday! Christians know the right thing to do. Christians have the best intentions. Yet our mis-guided priorities and our overbooked lives keep us for doing the right thing. Our spirit is willing, but our flesh is weak!
Here is what I wish to take away from my accident: Give my calendar to God and allow Him to direct my life. When someone or something tries to put an item in my calendar, I should stop and ask--is this from God? Is this going to give God honor and praise? Is this going to keep me from doing what God wants me to do?
Give my priorities to God and let Him direct them. If I am success at giving Him all of this, then I will never be too busy to spend time with Him; I will never be too busy to spend time with my family; and I will never be too busy to give back to others!
We are in the busiest time of the year! Don't let the Devil rob you of your joy and most importantly, don't let an opportunity pass to give to others!
I know the statement I just typed is more than a mouth full and may not make sense, so let me briefly explain:
I believe with all of my heart that the #1 tool Satan uses to keep us from experiencing all that God has for us is being TOO BUSY! For years I have heard this proverb, "An idle mind is the Devil's workshop." I am here to tell you that THE OPPOSITE is true and here is my new proverb: "An overbook calendar and ungodly priorities are the Devil's workshop!"
I am guilty of having ungodly priorities. I am guilty of having an overbooked calendar. And now that God has brought this storm into my life, I have realized that my priorities and my calendar are God's and He is the one that should be directing my path!
I see it everyday! Christians know the right thing to do. Christians have the best intentions. Yet our mis-guided priorities and our overbooked lives keep us for doing the right thing. Our spirit is willing, but our flesh is weak!
Here is what I wish to take away from my accident: Give my calendar to God and allow Him to direct my life. When someone or something tries to put an item in my calendar, I should stop and ask--is this from God? Is this going to give God honor and praise? Is this going to keep me from doing what God wants me to do?
Give my priorities to God and let Him direct them. If I am success at giving Him all of this, then I will never be too busy to spend time with Him; I will never be too busy to spend time with my family; and I will never be too busy to give back to others!
We are in the busiest time of the year! Don't let the Devil rob you of your joy and most importantly, don't let an opportunity pass to give to others!
Lesson #10
4 months + 4 days
I am a changed person, like a person with a new name, I will never be the same and I have no desire to go back to the person I was!
This storm has changed my life. If you have been reading this blog for a while, you already know what I am saying. I still need improving. There are things that I should be doing that I am not doing well. This storm in no way has made me perfect, but it has changed me for the better. I have learned so much. I have matured so much. I have a new perspective of God that I did not have before. I have been changed. I am like a person with a new name. I will never be the same and have no desire to go back!
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
4 Month Anniversary
Day 120
I have spent the last several days looking back over the past 4 months. Hard to imagine that 4 months ago to this day, I fell 14' and blew my heels away! So much has happened! Here is an update on my current status:
- I have not used my wheel chair in 2 weeks!
- Physical Therapy is progressing and is SO helpful to my recovery.
- I am walking most everywhere with the help of a crutch.
- My next doc appt is this Thursday, Dec 11.
Thanks again for all of your calls, emails and most of all, your prayers. It has been an exciting 4 months and I am so thankful for all that has transpired!
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Side-Bar...I Must Chase A Rabbit!
Day 117
I will have to include what I am about to tell in you my "Things Learned" list. If I don't write about it now, I will forget the details....because I have several things on my list!
Tonight, I was reminded of something that I never wish to forget. I have a better understanding of people who have disabilities. I have a better understanding of what people with disabilities have to go through on a daily basis. Therefore, I wish to never take some one's disability for granted!
Having a disability has proven to me how nice and generous people can be and also how inconsiderate they can be. I have had complete strangers come up to me, asking if I need assistance. In most cases, I tell them "no thank you." But recently, I made a trip to Sam's Club and I over-did it on my feet that morning. I finally made it back to my car and I was in great pain. A stranger walked up to me and asked if he could remove the items from my cart and load them in my car. I said, "Yes, sir, and thank you very much!" I have had doors opened for me and just 100s of simple kind things. It puts a smile on your face!
Unfortunately, there is a flip side of this coin. There are moments when people forget that you have a disability or they just don't take it into consideration. They invite you to an activity and yet provide you with limited opportunity to participate. And when you mention that you can't participate because of limitations, they do nothing to minimize the limitations that could allow you more participation.
This post is not a pity party for me. I just wish to convey to you the frustrations that people with disabilities have to endure. I wish for you (and me) to take into consideration the person and their disability.
I will never forget my time with a disability. It has been good for me. I have learned many things!
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Lesson #9
God Is Truly All That You Need!
Either you have already had such an experience OR you will soon go through one....but in time, you will have a moment where everything is stripped away; you will be completely exposed, raw if you will and it will be that moment when you realize God is all that is left.
I can remember a couple of these moments while I was in the hospital. I was alone and was over-come with feelings of loneliness and sadness. I could not walk. I was told I may never walk correctly again. I was in lots of pain. I could not work. I could not leave my bed. I was completely dependant on other people for everything from cooking my meals to wiping my behind. I was in control of NOTHING! For a control freak like myself, it was like my skin had been ripped off my body. I was raw and exposed to all elements and there was nothing I could do to change the situation.
The ONLY comfort I could get was from God. He was there with me. I truly was not alone at all. He comforted me. He took away my negative feelings. He put a smile on my face. He gave me joy despite my circumstances. The words He wrote in the Bible gave me hope; a hope that would not (and did not) disappoint me!
So you see, we get attached to a lot of things and people here on earth. It is easy (when things are going well) to use these attachments as our security blanket. But I am here to tell you that when these "attachments" are ripped away, you soon remember that God should be our only security blanket; our first and highest attachment!
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Lesson 7 & 8
I Already Knew Who My True Friends Were!
When I fell and even until now, my true friends, those that stuck closer to me than a brother, have proven themselves over and over again that they INDEED are my truest and closest of friends. They have sacrificed time, money and energy; doing, fixing, calling and going places for me and my family. My family would not have made it through this crisis without their help, love and devotion! Actions speak louder than words and let me tell you, their actions spoke volumes to Robbie and me!! Their actions reminded me of a covenant friendship that is found in First Samuel 18. Jonathan and David had a covenant friendship. They were not acquaintances. They were not fair-weather friends. They were not crisis-only friends. They were true friends. No matter the circumstances, they stuck to each other. They were committed to each other. They defended each other. They helped each other and they encouraged each other. Wow...how refreshing to have such friends!
The lesson here is this: You have many acquaintances, but you have only a few true friends. We must be kind and friendly to all people, but we must "stick closer than a brother" to those we have made a friendship covenant with! Cherish your true friends. Never leave their side. Never be SO BUSY that you can't carve out time for your dearest friends! Be there for them when they need you and stay with them till the end of time!
The header to this post says lessons 7 & 8. Lesson 7 is what I typed above. Lesson 8 is along the same lines, but the reverse and is a little too personal for me to write about.
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